A Man Received an Angry Letter From His Neighbors For Sitting on His Own Property Because They Didn’t Want Him Near Their Unsupervised Children

John, a man living in a rural area, faces a dilemma when his neighbors express discomfort with his presence by a pond that is on his property because he was sitting near their kids playing. Here is what he had to say:

A Rural Setting

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John, a 40-year-old man, lived in a somewhat rural place with decent land between houses and a lot of forest. In between his land and his neighbor’s land was a decent-sized pond, technically all on his land, but one side of it was surrounded by his neighbor’s land. There was a dock on it that John upgraded about 15 years ago, making it somewhat nice. It was right next to the property boundary, which would become important later.

He Regularly Uses the Pond

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John would go down to the pond somewhat often, usually for a few hours in the evening with his dog, his work computer, and sometimes a drink. His neighbors, a couple in their late 20s/early 30s who moved in a few years ago, had a pair of young kids, both under ten. Their backyard was not far from where John was in the evening, and neither yard was fenced in. Every few days, the kids would come outside when John was down by the pond.

They Felt Uncomfortable

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John would usually ignore them, but about a week ago, his neighbors approached him and asked if he would go inside or somewhere else when their kids were outside. They said they felt uncomfortable letting their kids go into the backyard and that their kids were also scared of John’s dog.

He Didn’t Pay Attention

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John did not pay any attention to their kids, usually facing away from them and never directly facing them. He understood why they would not want their kids outside alone with him nearby, but he wanted to clarify that he was not on any registry nor did he have any criminal history. However, he understood that they may feel uneasy about their kids being around a man they did not know very well.

The Dog was Large

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John’s dog was always tied up when he was on the dock with him. He never barked when they were down there, usually napping. He was a fairly large dog, weighing 75-80 pounds, but there was almost no chance he could or would hurt the kids.

Accused of Drinking in Excess

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The neighbors also expressed concern about John drinking. John assured them that he did not get anywhere near the point of being intoxicated, and it was at most one drink when he did have it, which was only a couple of times a month.

He Received an Angry Letter

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John told them that he appreciated them reaching out to him, but he was not going to stop going down to the pond. This week, he kept doing it, and he received a somewhat angry letter.

Straight to the Internet

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John started to doubt if he should just head inside whenever his neighbors come outside. He didn’t want to cause any more tension between them, but he also didn’t want to give up his peaceful evening routine. John decides to head to the internet and asks a popular internet forum for ideas.

The Internet Responds

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One person comments, “I don’t understand how they are mad at you for quietly using your own property. It’s bonkers. As a mom of young-ish kids it’s important to teach the kids to be good neighbours too, by letting them play quietly and do their own thing without interrupting your joy of using your own property.”

More Internet Comments

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Another person writes, “I feel like the easy fix for this is a good meet and greet lunch or something. Show he’s a normal dude who like the outdoors, show that his dog is actually just a sweety who’s tied up, and have the kids (and parents really) practice their needed people skills.

Not saying he’s in the wrong, and the family could totally not go for that, but that’s the nicest way to fix this and have a good relationship with your neighbors. People here are too concerned with “they are the jerk so you don’t have to be nice” when sometimes it’s better to try to be pleasant. You’re stuck with these neighbors for a while at least so try to make nice?”

A Final Response

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A final person writes, “Tell them to build their kids a fence if they don’t like it. You are on your property, they don’t get to dictate your behavior on your own property. If they don’t like it their kids can play in the front yard, they can supervise their kids while outside, or they can build a fence. Not your problem.”

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