A woman is gifted part of the proceeds of her grandmother’s house sale, but her mother has other ideas for the money, leading to a big argument. Here’s what the woman had to say:
Her Grandmother Wanted To Gift Her Money
The woman said, “This just happened and I feel like I maybe completely misread the situation so here’s what happened: A house that belongs to my grandmother and her siblings is about to be sold, and about a month ago my grandmother told my mom that she wishes to gift me her cut from the sale of the house.”
They Were Financially Comfortable
The woman’s grandmother was well-off financially and could afford such a gesture without any financial strain. The woman’s mother was also financially stable, owning her own home and she had a steady income. Throughout her life, her mother had always been very supportive, making clear that the woman could rely on her if necessary.
Her Mom Had Different Ideas
However, things took an unexpected turn when the mother mentioned the idea of investing the money that would be gifted to the woman, into a holiday home instead. She suggested that this home would eventually belong to the woman, stating that it would be her inheritance if she were to pass away.
The Woman Needed The Money
This suggestion left the woman stunned, as she had different plans for the money. She lived in a southern European country hit by economic recession and COVID-19, and she wanted to invest the money in an apartment to secure her financial independence and potentially generate extra income through renting.
But She Felt Conflicted
The woman shared her intentions with her mother, who the woman explained, “While she liked the idea she seemed disappointed and I almost felt bad that I took away her dream of owning a holiday home.”
The Woman Felt Bothered By It All
One night the woman and her mom were arguing about an unrelated issue, and the topic of the money and the holiday home came up again. The woman explained “I mentioned that because it has been bothering me since then. How she sort of took ownership of my money.”
They Argued
However, the woman was shocked by how her mom reacted. “She completely gaslighted me”, the woman said, and her mom told her that she never said anything about using the money for a holiday home. The woman recalled the conversion word for word, but her mom insisted that wasn’t her intention and questioned how she could even think such a thing.
They Had Different Recollections
Her mom kept insisting that the woman had misunderstood what she said. The woman was left feeling conflicted and doubted her own understanding of what had been said.
Was The Woman In the Wrong?
The woman was worried that she had falsely accused her mother of trying to “steal” her money. However, the woman couldn’t shake off the feeling that her mother initially had a different plan for the money that was to be gifted to her by her grandmother.
The Internet Responded
One person said, “Tell your grandmother what your Mom plans to do. Tell Grandma that if she does intend to give you money, she should give it directly to you and not give it to your mother to give to you.”
Another Person Said
“Hugs to you because having a mother gaslight you when you KNOW what happened is the worst. Speak directly to your grandmother and say that your mom told you about the gift she wants to make (since grandma may not have wanted you to know yet as a surprise) and that based on this conversation, you are hoping grandma will give the gift explicitly to you (an account with only your name on it, a trust for only you, etc)”