A woman recently asked if she was wrong for not wanting to organise a birthday party for her so called good friend. She had previously organised many parties for this couple but surprisingly, they didn’t invite her to their wedding. Was this a one-way type of friendship? Here’s what the woman had to say:
They Were Good Friends
“I first met my friend Jane (29 years old) studying abroad. We were really good friends during our travels and after college, we actively stayed in touch visiting each other in our respective different cities. I met her boyfriend (now husband) when they first started dating and have met her college friends and parents.”
They Spent a Lot of Time Together
During the Covid lockdown, Bob and Jane moved to the same city as them, and the woman celebrated birthdays together and had Thanksgiving and Christmas parties.
She Organised Their Party
In 2021, Bob and Jane got engaged, and the woman threw an engagement party. She even bought Jane a special wine glass, and Jane would send pictures whenever she used it.
She Wasn’t Invited To Janes’s Party
In 2022, the woman organized a 30th birthday party for Bob, but she weren’t invited to Jane’s birthday celebration. The woman explained, “I had texted Bob asking what the plan was and he told me they were going out of the state for her birthday – however on Instagram I saw them posting pictures of them renting a cabin with some friends…so I felt awkward.”
And Wasn’t Invited To The Wedding
The woman was also not invited to the bachelorette party, but understood that Jane had close childhood and sorority friends. However, the real hurt came when she wasn’t invited to the wedding in May, which had a guest list of around 200 people.
They Started To Drift Apart
The woman explained, “I was really hurt, to say the least, but I didn’t say anything. I just tried to move on – I haven’t talked to them really since before the wedding – they didn’t wish me a happy birthday and they couldn’t attend my birthday shindig cause they were out of town.”
She Noticed a Pattern
The woman noticed that Bob and Jane rarely got in contact unless she was the one to reach out.
They Wanted Her To Plan Another Event
Recently, Bob asked the woman to plan Jane’s upcoming birthday party, praising her planning skills. However, when she expressed her hurt feelings about not being invited to the wedding, Bob dismissed it, citing limited space as the reason, and assured her they wanted them at Jane’s birthday celebration.
Was She In The Wrong?
Feeling conflicted, the woman was left questioning if she was being petty for not wanting to plan the party.
The Internet Responded
One person said, “Space at the wedding wasn’t a problem if they had 200 guests. They don’t want you to be at her birthday, they want your skills in planning out her birthday. Bob said as much.”
Another Person Said
“They froze you out, and then made absolutely no effort to reach out until now, when they want something from you? Time is valuable – spend yours with the people whose actions show they want to spend it with you. It appears to be clear that they do not.”
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