A man had a 26-year-old son named Alan, who had recently become married to his beloved wife, Helen. The man always did not like large social gatherings, this was never really an issue until he had to attend his son’s wedding. What resulted was a furious Daughter-in-law and upset son. Here is what he had to say:
A Grand Wedding
Alan and his wife’s wedding was a grand affair. The father had found out in advance that Alan and Helen were due to be joined by approximately 150 guests.
Disliking Large Events
Prior to the event, Alan’s father noted to his son that he was reluctant to attend such an extensive celebration to Alan in advance. “I really dislike parties and large gatherings, I’m not sociable at all, and I really just dislike them”, the father wrote.
An Early Departure
As a compromise, the man informed his son that he would still attend, but that he intended to leave the wedding early and that the rest of the family would take separate cars to allow them to stay if they wished. Alan appeared to accept this arrangement without issue.
The Wedding Day
The big day soon came about, and Alan’s father expressed his happiness and approval of the event. However, he reiterated his initial plan to leave early to his son. Alan inquired if the man would at least stay for the cake or food, but the man found the food unappealing and stuck to his decision to depart.
Despite seeming understanding of his father when first informed of his father’s intention to leave early, Alan seemed disappointed: ‘He said “alright whatever, just go” and I went back to my table to get my stuff’, the father recounted.
The man informed his wife that he was ready to leave. She voiced concerns about him driving back alone due to the venue’s remote location and the poor road conditions. Eventually, the man’s wife decided to accompany him in their departure after some discussion.
Two days later, Alan’s wife, Helen, inundated the man and his wife with a barrage of messages, expressing her disgust and hurling hurtful insults at them. She accused them of ruining the wedding for Alan and engaged in offensive language. The man confronted Helen, questioning the appropriateness of her behavior towards her in-laws.
A Son’s Anger
Upon contacting Alan to discuss the matter, the man’s son responded with anger and berated him, accusing him of being a recurrent issue and demanding to be left alone. The conversation ended abruptly when Alan hung up.
A Question Of Justification
The man found himself conflicted. His son knew that he struggled to handle large events, and had been warned of his plans in advance. However, he also saw how visibly upset both his son and daughter-in-law became due to his actions, making him question whether he had made the right decision.
The man headed online with his woes, hoping to find validation from internet strangers. Unfortunately, this was not what he was due to receive. “100% you’re in the wrong”, accused one reader. “It’s your son’s wedding and no matter how uncomfortable you feel, it’s your duty as a father to be there. It’s one evening. Suck it up, man.”
A Unanimous Response
Unfortunately for the man, such responses were common. “You didn’t even stay for the meal that they’d paid for”, another commenter wrote angrily. “What an absolutely disgusting lack of love and respect from you as a parent. You also strong-armed your wife into leaving too. Your son had no parents present at his reception. How you don’t see that is a mystery to me”
One reader chimed in with sympathy for Alan, experiencing a similar situation themselves. “My ‘dad’ did this at my wedding”, they wrote. “I begged him crying to stay, I didn’t get a father/daughter dance. It’s been 19 years and I am still not over it. We have basically no relationship anymore.”
Missing An Important Event
Many commenters reminded the man that he would regret this decision in later life. “You missed all of the traditional wedding reception things”, one wrote. “You didn’t make a speech, your wife didn’t dance with your son. He didn’t have his parents there to celebrate with him, even for an hour or two. You didn’t express love, just a “Hey you look great but I am going to leave”.
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