After years of waiting, a woman in her late 20s moved in with her longtime girlfriend. But her mother was outraged when they decided to make their apartment into a religion-free zone. Now, her friends think she is using her trauma ‘as an outlet for revenge.’
They Moved in Together
The woman said, ‘My girlfriend and I finally moved in together after dating for three years’.
It Was So Exciting
Due to financial issues, the pair had never been able to live together. So, when it finally happened, they were incredibly excited. It was their first time living exclusively with a partner, and they couldn’t wait.
Their Parents Were Super Religious
The woman had grown up Catholic; her mother and late father had taken her to church every Sunday, prayed before their snacks and meals, and were very involved in the church. But, when the woman grew up, she started losing faith and decided not to go through with her confirmation.
Her Mother Didn’t Like That She Was Bisexual
Her mother was extremely upset when she refused her confirmation, but fortunately, her priest supported her decision. After all, it was a personal journey, and it was her right to deny it. When she came out as bisexual, her mother disapproved. The woman thought this was strange as her mother supported gay rights but wanted her daughter to ‘grow out’ of her queerness. It caused a lot of tension between them.
She Called Her Girlfriend a Predator
When the woman reached 18, she partially distanced herself from her mother. Luckily, as time passed, her mother’s opinions mellowed a bit, but she continued to invite her daughter to church every weekend. This annoyed the woman, but she felt her mother took it too far when she accused her girlfriend of being a predator.
It Was Homophobic
The woman’s partner was only five years older than her, but the mother felt that was enough to brandish her girlfriend as a predator. This infuriated the woman, and she believed her mother’s homophobia and Catholicism had fueled the comment. Other than that, the mother had been respectful to the woman’s girlfriend because she was well aware that if push came to shove, her daughter would choose her partner over her mom.
Her Partner Had a Traumatic Upbringing
Her girlfriend also had a religious background, and although she still believed in God, religion made her uncomfortable. After being outed at 12 years old, her parents began to abuse her, using ‘god’s mission’ and bible quotes as an excuse. And when she turned 18, they disowned her. She was traumatized, so they made a strict rule when the women decided to live together.
It Was a No-Religion Household
Because of both women’s past trauma, they decided to make their apartment a religion-free zone. This meant anyone who entered their home could not speak about religion, proselytize, wear religious symbols, or pray. When her mother found out about this, she was outraged, especially because she was asked to take off or cover up her cross when she came over and never talk about church.
Her Mother Was Angry
The woman said, ‘My mother hates that because all her friends are churchgoers, and 80% of her stories relate to something happening in church.’
Was it Too Far?
The mother claimed that her daughter and partner were hypocrites, but the woman stated that her mother was lucky to be in her life. When she told her friends about this, they said she and her girlfriend were taking things too far and using their ‘trauma as an outlet for revenge.’ The woman was conflicted by this and asked the internet for advice.
The Internet Had Thoughts
One person said, ‘Your house, your rules!’
Others Had Ideas
Another person commented, ‘Cover up her cross and not talk about 80% of how she is spending her time, what even is the point of keeping contact with the woman?’
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Images are for illustrative purposes only
AITA for making our home into a no-religion space, and including my mother in the rules?
byu/Cute_Side9203 inAmItheAsshole