A man in his late 20s is considering a divorce after finding out his wife had been calling his daughter by a different name for a year. She wants to change the name legally, but he thinks it’s creepy.
They Had a Deal
The man said, ‘When my wife, 31, and I, 29, were trying to get pregnant, we had a deal.’
He Bet on a Girl
The deal was that if the child were a boy, the mother would pick the entire name, but if it was a girl, it was his choice. Each parent would be allowed one veto to avoid ending up with a name they hated.
A Mother Knows
However, the man’s dreams of a girl were dashed when his wife said she felt the baby in her belly was a boy. He didn’t mind what gender his child was, but he just had it in his heart that his first child would be a daughter. But the mother and her family were convinced; after all, a mother knows…
It Was a Blue Shower
During the baby shower, everything was blue, and the wife asked everyone to supply explicitly masculine gifts. The man’s mother-in-law had already started knitting bits and bobs with the name that his wife had chosen. But when the baby came, the wife was shocked.
I Guess a Mother Doesn’t Know
To the surprise of everybody, the baby was born a girl. The man was over the moon; he had always imagined a girl as his first child. His wife, although extremely tired, was also happy. The man enjoyed writing his name on the birth certificate.
His Daughter Didn’t Know Her Own Name
A year later, the father didn’t know why his daughter couldn’t recognize her name. That was until he came home one day and caught his mother-in-law and wife talking about his daughter but using a completely different name. Suddenly, his daughter’s confusion made sense.
They Were Like a Deer in Headlights
The father asked his mother-in-law and wife who they were referring to, and immediately, they were like a deer in headlights. They said that they were talking about his daughter. He was outraged, and when he asked why they were using a different name to the one he chose, the mother-in-law replied that it was because that’s what they had decided collectively to call her.
It Was Unfair
The man said, ‘Then she went on a rant about how it’s unfair that I chose the name and how it’s completely unsuitable for her.’
They Had a Massive Argument
Of course, the couple had a huge argument. They had a deal, and his wife had broken it without letting him know of her issues with his choice. The worst part was that she had been calling her daughter a feminized version of the name she was going to pick when she thought the baby was going to be a boy, and he did not like it. She said she wanted to change her daughter’s name legally, and the man said no, putting his foot down, but she claimed he was being controlling. The argument continued, and his wife left him and their daughter and went to her parents. The man thought the entire thing was creepy and considered the worst.
Was He in the Wrong?
How his wife had sneakily called his daughter by another name felt weird to the man, even creepy. He even considered divorcing her! His parents and friends understood his annoyance but told him to compromise with his wife, but he didn’t think that was fair. Conflicted, he asked the internet for advice.
The Internet Provided
One person said, ‘The only person being controlling here is the one trying to insist that twelve months later, she gets to change your daughter’s name.’
Others Had Thoughts
Another commented, ‘I find it hard to believe that you have both used different names for a year, and no one has realized until now.’
A final commenter pointed out the foolishness of their deal in the first place, ‘something as important as your daughter’s name shouldn’t be decided by one of you because of some stupid deal, you made the baby together so should name them together, that way everyone would have been happy.’
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