Despite the progress made toward gender equality in today’s world, women still find themselves grappling with unrealistic societal expectations that persist. An internet survey recently asked, “What are outdated expectations for women?” Here are the 18 best responses:
The Idea That a Stay at Home Woman Is Less Than a Woman Who Works and Has a Home
“We went the other way with the whole women working concept.”
“I feel this. I work part-time, keep the house clean/make meals/ take primary care of our son because I want to. But I feel guilty about not working full-time for no other reason than societal pressures.”
Having To Smile and Accommodate Other People’s Awkward and Rude Behavior
“I stopped doing the smile and awkwardly laugh response to men who make inappropriate comments. I stare them down, and sometimes they get awkward or apologize. I’d recommend it; it feels great!”
Automatically Assuming All Women Enjoy, Want, and Will Have Children
“I get irritated enough when this happens to me as a single queer woman. But it seems to be relentless for my married friends in relationships with men. Relatives, coworkers, and strangers. They all seem to think it’s reasonable to ask about it. It’s heartbreaking for the people who try and can’t or have lost babies. It boggles my mind that people think it’s okay to casually ask about something so intensely personal.”
“Yup, and if you have one, you must have another. You know, for reasons.”
Being Devoted to Bad Husbands
“And continuing to stay with them even when they know they’re bad.”
“When I left my ex-husband, my mom and grandma tried to convince me to stay. They both are married to men that aren’t good to them and never left or plan on leaving. I am the happiest I have ever been and have found my soulmate.”
Providing Free Emotional Labor
“My favorite meme lately was pointing out that the term “gold digger” should include men who want their partners to do all their emotional labor.”
“It’s mind-blowing how many guys expect you to be a free therapist to them. Like, uh, I didn’t sign up for this.”
Taking Care of a Husband Like He Is an Overgrown Toddler Incapable of Doing Anything for Himself
“Yup. The guys that keep on acting like helpless toddlers towards their spouses are the same guys who complain about dead bedrooms.”
“Working as an RN, caring for men like this makes me picky when choosing a partner, and my standards are horribly high.”
Women Should Do All the Cooking and Cleaning
“Some people want a 1950s style housewife without doing any of the 1950’s husband things.”
Being the “Peacemaker” in a Situation
“Always disliked how women were seen as the “heart” of the family, keeping it all together. They want it to sound noble, but it sounds exhausting and unfair. Like no one in a family can function without a woman doing the emotional labor.”
“This! So many men view you differently when you’re unapologetically yourself. I’m loud and stand up for myself when I need to, and men give you that ‘how dare you look,’ and it fills me with power.”
Dressing for Men
“I see many people tell women that they should not dye or cut their hair, not get tattoos, or wear certain fashions because it is unappealing to men. However, many women nowadays (like me) dress for themselves and not for male pleasure.”
“I’d have never known that I preferred a type of underwear had I not been open to suggestions. And I’m not saying to have your SO dictate your clothes, but it is okay to consider. I enjoy sundresses, but I’m more likely to purchase more knowing that my SO likes them too (otherwise, I’m typically in jeans and a t-shirt).”
Being Docile and Passive
“We’re expected to take so much daily without complaining.”
“I just left my bf because of all of these reasons. He paid me a lot of lip service. Still, I spent the whole time being his accessory/personal assistant/concierge with zero validation. My needs/feelings/boundaries were completely ignored, and it felt like the worst unpaid job ever.”
Giving Birth
“It is the second most terrifying and painful thing a person can go through; the first is burning alive. The industry is great at hiding the many difficulties of pregnancy to further the human race.”
“I’m right there with you. Even thinking about being pregnant and having something growing inside me terrifies me.”
All Women Want a Man/Relationship
“I’ve been happily single for years and don’t want to be in a relationship. I don’t get why people assume that single women aren’t as happy as the ones in a relationship when it was proven that single women are the happiest population out there.”
“Especially since the life expectancy of a woman goes up when she’s single but goes down for a man that’s single.”
To Never Care About a Man’s Looks, Only His Heart or Wallet
“Looks aren’t everything, but for some reason, women are expected to sacrifice their physical attraction to men just to get one.”
“It’s much more acceptable for men to be overweight than women. “Beer guts” and “Dad bods” are acceptable terms in our culture. Still, every woman who gains weight from having a baby wants to lose it ASAP after giving birth.”
They Need To Wear Makeup To Look Presentable
“Many people think it is lazy for a woman to not have any makeup on.”
“In one of my old workplace contracts, women must dress in nice fitting clothes and some makeup. Ridiculous when most of the male management barely ironed their shirts.”
A Woman Will Take Her Husband’s Last Name Upon Marriage
“Last time I mentioned keeping my last name to my partner, he gave me the silent treatment. It hasn’t been brought up again, but I’m not budging. I don’t see the issue; we’re not having kids; it’s not being passed down. I have to change it on every piece of ID I have for no reason.”
“I kept my last name, and people just act like we are not married because of it.”
We Are Expected To Smile All the Time to Everyone for No Reason at All
“Men don’t do this, aren’t expected to, and don’t get approached unsolicited from strangers in public with advice to “smile more.””
“Telling someone to “smile more” is such a creepy thing to say to someone. Always hated that.”
That a Woman Is Dispensable After a Certain Age
“And that men age like fine wine. If they take care of themselves, then maybe. But most of them don’t.”
That Women Automatically Make Better Caregivers
“As a carer, I can confirm that the men on our team are just as good as most of/better than some of the women, but there are 4 men in a team of 48 carers. It makes no sense.”
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