A 32-year-old man, who recently inherited a life-changing amount of money from his grandfather, is facing a moral dilemma.
A Hefty Inheritance
He was shocked to learn that his grandfather had left him a sizeable sum of money, which was not only a life-changing amount but also a surprise since he didn’t know that his grandfather had that kind of money. His grandfather had three grandchildren: the man, his younger sister, and his older brother. While he wasn’t the only one left money in the will, he was the only grandchild.
However, his older brother did not have much of a relationship with their grandfather. They only exchanged cards and calls on birthdays and Christmas, but there was no contact in between.
A Different Perspective
His brother came to the funeral but didn’t seem particularly broken up, although he may have been more upset than he was letting on. On the other hand, the man and his younger sister were both devastated by their grandfather’s passing.
The man had a close relationship with his grandfather. He spent a lot of time at his house, and they shared a lot of similar interests. His younger sister also loved their grandfather and used to spend months every year finding or making the perfect gift for birthdays and Christmas. Gift-giving was very important to her, as she firmly believed that the effort you put into a gift reflects the level of affection you feel.
He Never Warmed to Her
However, their grandfather never really seemed to warm to her the way he did with the man. The grandfather and the man’s younger sister shared a love of art and she used to invite him to go with her to galleries and museums, but he rarely accepted. The man was never really clear about why.
His younger sister has always suffered from depression, and their grandfather was of the generation where depression was seen as being “lazy” and something you could just get over if you tried a bit harder, so maybe that was why. He was never rude to her, but he didn’t go out of his way to spend time with her the way he did with the man.
She Was Upset
The man’s younger sister hasn’t said anything, but he can tell that she was hurt not to be remembered in their grandfather’s will. He doesn’t think she’s even upset about not getting any money, but some people who weren’t left money were left keepsakes, while she got nothing at all.
Return to Sender
He knows that she asked their parents that if they found any of the poems she had written for their grandfather if she could have them back (she sometimes writes and illustrates poems for people as gifts).
A Kind Gesture
The man has decided that he wants to split his inheritance with his younger sister 50/50. He believes that it’s not like she didn’t try to have a close relationship with their grandfather; he, for whatever reason, chose not to have a close relationship with her. He doesn’t feel any need to give any money to his older brother, who didn’t try to have a close relationship with their grandfather, and he’s not surprised that he wasn’t left anything in the will.
The man has told his parents that he wants to split his inheritance with his younger sister, but they have both said that it’s his money to do with as he likes, but giving money to his sister could cause bad blood between all three of them. They have also said that they are staying out of it from now on as they are all adults. The man thinks that not giving money to either of his siblings could also cause bad blood, but he hasn’t mentioned this to his parents since they’ve said they don’t want to get involved.
Would He be a Jerk?
The man is now seeking an unbiased perspective on whether he would be the jerk if he only split his inheritance with his younger sister. He’s worried that his decision could cause a rift between him and his siblings, but he also believes that it’s the right thing to do since his younger sister was not left anything in the will despite her efforts to have a close relationship with their grandfather.
The Internet Responded
This person posted, “If you want to share your inheritance with her, by all means do so. It would be tactful and go a long way to maintain family harmony if you DO NOT tell anyone that you have done so, and get a promise from her that she not tell, beforehand.”
A Final Comment
Another commenter wrote, “Not sure if this is the best idea either. Eventually it will come out and could be even worse on the relationships because of the deceit.”
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